i love the moon tonight. it's so low and heavy in the sky. it seems pregnant with possibilities. it reminds me that there will be many more nights in my life like tonight (which was absolutely wonderful). and knowing that life can be good is important for me to remember right now.

i had a really good day today (terrific night, good rest of the day). of course, i still thought about him every other minute. and i missed him every other time i thought about him. but i still had a really good day. and so basically, the way i'm going to get through this is to just keep going, and at some point i'll think about him every other hour, then after that it will maybe be once a day, and years from now i'll remember him casually, maybe every couple of years, and that will be okay.

so basically, as long as i don't drink, i'm okay. and if i ever have a night when i wanna be sad, i'll just buy a couple of beers or a bottle of wine and sit at home by myself where it's okay if i end up in a puddle of tears.